Chapter 43: Playing House

Ji Jinxuan listened to him speak. His mind, which had been numb for so long, finally began to work again. He pulled Xu Lin into his arms and said, “It’s my fault. It’s all my fault.”

Xu Lin pushed against his chest. Feeling the resistance, Ji Jinxuan held him even tighter. “I’m sorry.”

Xu Lin felt as if every bone in his body was about to be crushed. He heard Ji Jinxuan’s frantic promise, “I’ll give you a wedding. I will. A wedding that everyone can know about.

“There’s still time. It’s not too late.”

Xu Lin closed his eyes.

He gave up trying to communicate with Ji Jinxuan.

Ji Jinxuan had forcibly kept him there, so Xu Lin simply lay awake until dawn. The next day, he went back to the guest room as usual, making sure to lock the door so Ji Jinxuan could not carry him off again.

For now, he did not want to return to the master bedroom. He did not want to share a bed with Ji Jinxuan.

And so the seven days that Ji Jinxuan had promised passed.

When Xu Lin asked for the travel code, Ji Jinxuan said nothing in the face of his demand.

As Xu Lin had expected, Ji Jinxuan had never even prepared it.

In fact, when Xu Lin asked, Ji Jinxuan looked almost slightly surprised—as if he had believed that by staying in the villa for a week, Xu Lin would no longer bring up leaving.

“I thought we had,” Ji Jinxuan said, “come to an understanding.”

Xu Lin asked, “An understanding? About what?”

“I’m working on it,” Ji Jinxuan said. “Why do you still want to leave?” He was referring to what they had talked about that night.

Ji Jinxuan seemed to think that giving Xu Lin a new wedding ceremony could make up for everything in the past. That it would appease him.

But Xu Lin simply did not have the heart for that right now.

All he wanted was to go back to his hometown, to be with his teacher and his friends, to have some peace and quiet, to give himself enough space to process everything he had recently learned.

Ji Jinxuan had just gotten engaged to another Omega, and now he wanted to hold another wedding banquet with Xu Lin. And then what? Invite the same group of friends and relatives from last time? Tell them the engagement was void and this time it was the real wedding? Have them watch as the person beside Ji Jinxuan changed from an Omega to a Beta?

And then he would tell everyone that they had actually been married for six years, and this was just a make-up wedding for Xu Lin?

Xu Lin could not stomach that humiliation.

He had no such leisure or inclination.

Rationally, he understood that Ji Jinxuan had done all of this out of necessity. He knew Ji Jinxuan had his own difficulties. When Ji Jinxuan had told him the truth about the engagement, Xu Lin had tried very hard to understand and to forgive him. But even knowing that, the thorn that had pierced his heart was real. It was a small thorn, impossible to pull out, embedded in his flesh, causing a dull, persistent ache.

He needed time for that thorn to dissolve on its own before he could talk to Ji Jinxuan calmly.

Emotionally, he could not so quickly forget the image of Ji Jinxuan walking down the aisle with someone else. He could not forget the vows he had spoken to another, the rings they had exchanged. He could not forget that Ji Jinxuan had the ability to give him more, but had chosen not to.

He could not let go of everything so easily.

He minded. He felt sick about it. He was jealous. And he was heartbroken.

In the end, what he cared about was not the grand gestures or the material things built with money. What he cared about was Ji Jinxuan’s sincerity. Whether his love had been full of genuine intention from the very beginning.

His own wedding had been so simple and shabby, yet he had been happy about it for six years.

He was happy because he had believed that what Ji Jinxuan had given him from the start was the best he could offer.

But now he knew that was not true.

He was angry because Ji Jinxuan might never have truly cared about him at all.

“I don’t think this is the right time,” Xu Lin said, agitated. “If you don’t give me the travel code today, don’t ever expect me to speak to you again.”

At this, Ji Jinxuan fell silent.

Xu Lin returned to his room. Not long after, he heard the sound of the door opening and closing. He walked to the window and saw Ji Jinxuan drive away.

Xu Lin had never expected Ji Jinxuan to let him leave.

He had known from the very beginning that Ji Jinxuan was lying. The seven days had just been a stalling tactic.

Fortunately, Xu Lin had kept a backup plan.

He went to the master bedroom and retrieved the phone that Zong Ningshuang had given him from under the mattress.

He had known Ji Jinxuan could not be relied upon. On the second day after being confined, he had secretly messaged Zong Ningshuang, asking her to help him apply for a travel code.

He had no one else to turn to. He knew no one else in Danshi. So he had tentatively asked her, and she had agreed without hesitation.

She was Zong Xi’s sister. Xu Lin had assumed that Zong Xi would have told her everything and that she would not help him. But after subtly probing, it seemed Zong Xi had not breathed a word to her.

She had no idea about his relationship with Ji Jinxuan. She did not know that the person he had married was Ji Jinxuan.

Ji Jinxuan had said their marriage could not be known to anyone. Naturally, Zong Xi, as his close friend, kept his mouth shut, not even telling his sister.

That had made things easier for Xu Lin.

Zong Ningshuang had also said it would take a week to process the travel code, which was why Xu Lin had been patiently waiting these past few days.

Now that a week had passed, her side should have finished as well.

Xu Lin turned on the phone and eagerly messaged her. No reply.

He thought for a moment, then called her on video.

It took a while for Zong Ningshuang to answer.

Half of her face appeared on the screen.

Before he could even ask, she knew what he was going to say, “I had it all ready for you and was going to contact you in the next couple of days to deliver it. But somehow my brother found out and hid it!”

She seemed to be walking somewhere, the camera shaking violently. She lowered her voice, “He’s not here right now. I just searched his room and couldn’t find it. I’ll go check other places.”

Xu Lin felt a warmth in his chest. “I’m sorry for the trouble.”

“It’s nothing. Since you came to me, it means you don’t have anyone else to help you, right?”

Xu Lin fell silent.

Zong Ningshuang said, “Don’t worry. Leave it to me.”

Her house was huge. She searched several rooms without finding anything, working up a sweat. Their video call stayed connected, the two of them chatting on and off.

After about twenty minutes of searching, she entered what looked like a study and complained, “If it’s not here, I’ll have to try my brother’s safe.”

To make searching easier, she put her phone in her pocket. The screen was blurry, and all Xu Lin could hear was the clatter of drawers and cabinets being opened and closed.

“Where did he hide it?”

“Am I really going to have to break into his safe? But I don’t know the password. Or should I just reapply for you? Can you wait another week?” she asked as she searched.

She had already been so helpful that Xu Lin could not bring himself to say he did not want to spend another moment in Dan City. He lied: “If you really can’t find it, I’ll wait another week.”

After rummaging through a few more cabinets, Zong Ningshuang suddenly went quiet. Even through the phone, Xu Lin could hear footsteps approaching from the other end.

“Crap. Why is he back now?” She could not leave the study, so she ducked behind the bookshelf and crouched down, not daring to breathe. Xu Lin dared not make a sound either, waiting in silence. Less than half a minute after she had hidden, the study door opened.

The screen was dark. Through the phone’s speaker came a voice, “Here’s what you wanted.”

“Mm.”

One was Zong Xi. The other was Ji Jinxuan.

So Ji Jinxuan had gone out to see him?

What thing? What was he talking about?

Would Zong Xi tell Ji Jinxuan about the travel code? Would Ji Jinxuan find out that Zong Ning-shuang was helping him?

The two did not leave. They started talking.

Zong Ningshuang’s phone was still in her pocket. Xu Lin could not see anything, only hear their voices.

Their conversation came through muffled, as if through a layer of water.

Zong Xi said, “Using something like that to appease someone—it works once, maybe twice, but after that it loses its novelty.”

“He likes these.”

Zong Xi: “He wants to go home. So just let him go. Why are you forcing him to stay here?”

“If he leaves, he won’t come back.”

“How do you know?”

Ji Jinxuan did not answer.

Zong Xi clicked his tongue. “I’m telling you, just come clean with him already. Don’t you think it’s ridiculous to talk about throwing him another wedding now? Sure, the Chen family is leaning toward calling off the engagement, but the paperwork isn’t finalized yet. On paper, you’re still betrothed to Miss Chen.

“And suddenly you want to go all out with a Beta? What does that look like? Even if you don’t care about the Chen family, you should at least consider Xu Lin’s reputation. What will people think of him?

“Still engaged to the Chen family, and already tangled up with a Beta. To put it bluntly, people might even start spreading nasty rumors that Xu Lin is a homewrecker.”

Zong Ning-shuang covered her mouth. Hearing a familiar name from Zong Xi, her eyes widened in shock.

Almost instantly, the pieces clicked together in her mind. Fragments merged into the truth, and she understood everything.

In her current position, she could not hang up. All she could do was press her hand hard against her pocket, trying to block out the voices outside.

But their conversation still filtered through her palm, through her clothes, and into Xu Lin’s ears on the other end of the phone.

Ji Jinxuan said, “I married him first.”

“Ha, come on, man. ‘Married’? Don’t make me laugh. What you two had was a fake wedding. It was so shabby even I couldn’t stand to watch. Apart from you and me, who even knows about it? Who can prove you two have been together for six years? Who would believe it?

“If you knew this would happen, why did you do it in the first place? I told you from the start that keeping someone this way wouldn’t work. ‘Fix his face and let him go, no debts owed’—that was a terrible idea. You didn’t even like him, yet you insisted on keeping him in Dan City to repay a favor. Now look at you—you’ve lost control of the situation, haven’t you?”

Zong Ningshuang was not sure if Xu Lin had heard what came next. The more she listened, the more alarmed she became. Her palms were sweating, nearly soaking through the small piece of fabric she was pressing against.

After what felt like a long time, Zong Xi and Ji Jinxuan left.

She was the only one left in the study.

Trembling, she crawled out from behind the bookshelf and immediately pulled out her phone.

On the screen, the camera was pointed at a window.

Xu Lin was not visible.

She called out softly, “Xu Lin?”

There was only silence on the other end.

“Are… are you okay? Are you still there? I’ll find a way to get you that travel code. Don’t worry. I’ll figure something out…”

After a long moment, she heard Xu Lin’s voice from the other end, “Thank you.”

Zong Ningshuang bit her lip. Her voice trembled. “…Are you alright?”

Xu Lin sat on the bay window with his knees drawn up, leaning against the curtain, staring blankly at the phone.

He did not answer. His face was filled with confusion.

Was he alright?

He did not know.

The conversation between Zong Xi and Ji Jinxuan had left him completely baffled.

What did they mean by… fixing his face and then letting him leave? No debts owed? A fake wedding?

What did they mean by “you didn’t even like him, yet you insisted on keeping him in Danshi to repay a favor”?

The window reflected his own face.

He saw the scar that still remained on his cheek.

Years ago, his face had been far more disfigured than it was now.

He had been burned saving Ji Jinxuan. His face had been ruined.

And then…

He had been about to graduate. He had wanted to return to District Thirteen, to go home. Before leaving, he had confessed his feelings to Ji Jinxuan, thinking that since there was no future for them anyway, he might as well let him know.

And then—then Ji Jinxuan had proposed to him.

He had asked, “Do you… like me too?”

And Ji Jinxuan had said, “Yes.”

Yes.

He had said he liked him.

It was because he liked him that Xu Lin had agreed to be with him, to have a wedding no one would know about, to live alone on this isolated mountain.

Ji Jinxuan had proposed to him because he liked him, right?

Who would propose to someone they did not even like?

Fix his face, then let him leave.

Repay a favor.

A sharp ringing suddenly pierced Xu Lin’s ears. His stomach churned, and he could not help gagging dryly.

He clutched his chest. His insides felt like they were being churned upside down, his intestines tangling with every blood vessel in his body, threatening to grind him into pieces.

He could no longer hear Zong Ningshuang’s voice. He could hear nothing.

He fell off the bay window, his knees giving out. He collapsed to the floor, unable to stand. The pain was so severe he could not straighten his back. Cold sweat covered his body and face.

Through his blurred vision, he saw his own hand supporting him on the floor. He saw the ring on his ring finger.

A woman’s ring.

Suddenly, everything became clear.

Why Ji Jinxuan had given someone else a fake wedding that was grander than his own.

Because his was also fake.

He gave the Omega a lavish wedding because the Omega had value—she deserved the best.

He gave Xu Lin, a no-name Beta from District Thirteen, worthless, disfigured, nothing.

No real wedding. No proper ring. No lasting companionship. No right to message him freely. No right to be known by anyone. No right to stand beside Ji Jinxuan.

He was nothing but a filthy insect that could not see the light, locked in a cage for six years. And this stupid insect had mistaken that cage for its home.

All because of one moment of kindness, he had caused Ji Jinxuan so much trouble.

Ji Jinxuan was such an extraordinary Alpha, of course he could not stand being indebted to a lowly Beta.

And because this deluded Beta had feelings for him, he had graciously bestowed upon him a beautiful dream.

A dream he had thought was mutual love, but in reality, he had been the only one making a fool of himself.

Too busy with work to come home. Not liking kissing. Keeping his distance, refusing to touch him—it was all because Ji Jinxuan did not like him.

He had never liked him from the very beginning.

Their marriage was a lie, a performance Ji Jinxuan had put on for him alone for six whole years.

Six years. Xu Lin had never once doubted his feelings. He had thought their conflicts just needed adjustment, a natural hurdle in any marriage that required both of them to work through together.

But it turned out no adjustment was ever needed.

He had been wrong. Terribly, utterly wrong.

All the discomfort and strangeness in their relationship had one simple root cause: it was all just a game.

A game of make-believe that only Xu Lin had taken seriously.

“Hahaha…”

Xu Lin had no strength left. He curled up on the floor, laughing softly at first, then louder and louder. By the end, his cheeks were wet, and every bone in his body felt loose and disconnected.

In his upside-down vision, he saw the wedding photo on the wall. He could now read the expression on Ji Jinxuan’s face in that picture. It was not expressionless at all—it was disgust. It was cold indifference. It was the look of someone who found the person beside him utterly repulsive.

Xu Lin’s vision blurred. His ears were damp.

Shaking, he tried to remove the ring from his finger, but his fingers would not cooperate. So he put his finger in his mouth and bit the woman’s ring off with his teeth, little by little.

His teeth ground against the small circle. He took a deep breath and spat it out with all his force.

The ring rolled, hit the wall, and stopped.

Xu Lin laughed aloud in the empty room, unable to stop. He was like a madman whose insides had been hollowed out by worms.