Chapter 76: Without him, do you not want to live?

Smiling. What was there to smile about?

Xu Lin said coldly, “Why are you following me?”

Ji Jinxuan did not answer. Without warning, he said, “Thank you.”

Those words told Xu Lin he could not pretend otherwise.

He had wanted to deliberately ignore the topic, to act as if he had never gone to the basement, never discovered Ji Jinxuan in his heat, never used his pheromones to help him. He had assumed that if he did not bring it up, Ji Jinxuan probably would not either. The best way to handle it would be to pretend nothing had happened.

But he had not expected Ji Jinxuan to break the unspoken agreement.

Their relationship could not afford even a single step beyond the line. The distance they had managed to maintain would be thrown off balance.

Giving his pheromones once meant nothing to Xu Lin. It was just that someone had needed help, so he had lent a hand. But to Ji Jinxuan, Xu Lin’s “small favor” seemed to be some kind of unspoken signal, giving him false hope.

To prevent Ji Jinxuan from getting the wrong idea, Xu Lin decided to make things clear. “I did it for Xiao Zhao. He needs your treatment. Don’t read too much into it.”

Ji Jinxuan paused, his smile fading slightly. “I’m not reading too much into it. I’m just a little happy.”

Xu Lin did not ask why the basement existed in his institute, why it was arranged exactly like his room in District Thirteen, why he kept his old shirt, why he kept the suppressants made from his pheromones but refused to use them.

Why, when he knew Xu Lin was in the institute, a single phone call could have brought countless people to ask Xu Lin to help him through his heat, and Xu Lin, for Xiao Zhao’s sake, would likely not have refused. All it would have taken was a word. Why had he done nothing?

A faint feeling in his heart warned him that this was a question he should not ask, could not ask. Asking too much would only make Ji Jinxuan think more. And it would entangle them even deeper.

It was enough to stop here.

They walked in silence, one after the other, toward the experimental building.

Xiao Zhao had already taken the medication and was under observation. He was sitting in the closed observation room, playing with blocks with a Beta doctor. Through the glass, he spotted Xu Lin and waved at him.

He looked energetic, with no abnormalities.

Xiao Zhao would need to be observed for three hours after his first dose, so Xu Lin sat on the bench in the corridor and waited.

The office door nearby was open, and Xu Lin could see Ji Jinxuan talking with some people inside, likely inquiring about Xiao Zhao’s condition.

After a while, Ji Jinxuan came out to Xu Lin and briefly explained Xiao Zhao’s treatment plan for the next few days. He said nothing else unrelated.

As Xu Lin listened, he glanced up and noticed a few people who were clearly, though they thought subtly, staring in his direction. They were looking not just at him, but at him and Ji Jinxuan together.

The look in their eyes was far from innocent.

That blabbermouth employee must have spread the word after smelling Ji Jinxuan’s pheromones on him, likely embellishing the story.

Ji Jinxuan noticed Xu Lin was distracted and followed his gaze. The employees quickly busied themselves.

Before Xu Lin could say anything, Ji Jinxuan guessed what had happened. “I’ll clear it up. No one will spread rumors. Don’t worry.”

Xu Lin paused, then gave a low hum in acknowledgment.

That night, Xu Lin remembered someone. Borrowing a doctor’s phone, he dialed a number he had memorized.

It rang for a long time before someone answered. The voice on the other end was lazy, as if half asleep. “Hello?”

Hearing her voice, Xu Lin’s lips curved upward. “It’s me.”

The moment the words left his mouth, a frantic rustling came from the other end, as if she had bolted upright in bed. Her breathing unsteady, she hesitated before cautiously whispering, “Xu Lin? Is that really you?”

“Yes.”

At his confirmation, her voice rose with emotion. “You! You finally called me! It’s been so long. How are you? Where are you? What are you doing? I’m so glad you’re okay…” Her words tumbled out in a jumble, her stammering voice full of surprise and laughter.

“Wait, that’s not right.” She glanced at the screen. It was a number from the capital. “Where are you?”

Xu Lin said, “The capital.”

“Why are you here?” The only possibility that came to mind made her anxious. “Did that bastard Ji Jinxuan do something to you again? Did he drag you back here?”

“No, no.” She was getting more agitated, so Xu Lin soothed her. “I’m fine. I’m okay. I just had to come to the capital for something. I’ll be leaving in a while.”

Relieved that Xu Lin was not being held captive, she let out a breath. “Good. You scared me.”

“I’m borrowing someone else’s phone. I’ll have to return it soon.” Xu Lin said, “Are you free tomorrow? Want to meet up?”

She answered immediately, “Of course I’m free. Where should we meet?”

The next day, Xiao Zhao had his usual treatment. As he was about to enter the observation room, Xu Lin pulled him aside and whispered, “I need to leave for a few hours. I’ll be back soon. Be good and listen to the doctors, okay?”

Xiao Zhao took the Beta doctor’s hand and nodded obediently. “Make sure you bring me something good to eat when you come back.”

“Deal. Pinky promise.” Xu Lin hooked his pinky with Xiao Zhao’s, then left.

He borrowed a car and drove out of the institute.

Only after leaving the mountains did he realize he had not seen Ji Jinxuan all day.

The basement. The door was shut tight.

Raging pheromones surged through the room.

Ji Jinxuan lay curled on the small bed, clutching a shirt—the one Xu Lin had left behind the day before. He buried his face in it, breathing in the lingering trace of Xu Lin’s pheromones.

The room was dark, like a coffin buried deep underground, never seeing the light of day.

Ji Jinxuan lay in that coffin, slowly rotting away, devoured by worms, held together only by the familiar scent in the darkness that offered some comfort. Though he was not far from falling apart.

He kept his eyes open in the darkness. Sweat trickled into them, stinging, making him squint.

He rubbed the shirt in his arms, pressing his cheek against it.

He seemed to hear Zong Xi’s voice, saying something, scolding him.

“Why won’t you use it? What are you being so stubborn about? If his pheromones run out, we’ll find another way. There’s always a way. By forcing yourself through this, without Xu Lin’s pheromones, your heats will become more frequent, the intervals shorter. You know what happens to someone who’s been marked without pheromones to soothe them. Is your body made of iron? How much longer can you hold on?

“All for a few syringes of suppressants that will run out anyway? You’d rather die?

“Aren’t you afraid that one day you’ll never wake up? Or is it, Ji Jinxuan, that you’re doing this because you know Xu Lin will never look back, never come back to you. Without him, do you not want to live?”

Ji Jinxuan closed his eyes, raised his hand, and pressed his burning lips to the ring on his ring finger.

Yes.

Xu Lin stepped on the brake and pulled over to the curb.

He walked into the food stall that had not changed in three years and saw the familiar face at their usual spot.

“Shuangshuang,” he called.

Zong Ningshuang looked up. Her eyes instantly reddened. She stood and gave Xu Lin a bear hug. Startled for a moment, he then patted her back.

“Long time no see,” Xu Lin said.

Her voice was choked. “Long time no see.”

They held each other for a long while, drawing stares from the other customers.

Finally, they sat down.

She poured him a drink. “After you left, Ji Jinxuan came looking for you. I was so worried. Later, my brother told me you’d gotten away. I’ve been trying to find a way to contact you all these years, but I couldn’t.” She said regretfully, “I didn’t even know how you were doing. I couldn’t help you.”

Xu Lin said, “I’m fine. Don’t worry.”

“Where have you been all these years? I sent people to look everywhere and couldn’t find you.” Then, lowering her voice, she added, “I heard Ji Jinxuan was looking for you too. Be careful.”

Xu Lin smiled awkwardly. “He’s already found me.”

“What!” She slammed the table, splashing drink from her cup. Her voice was too loud, and Xu Lin shushed her.

He explained the situation, telling her about jumping into the sea, joining the Moqiu military district, and Xiao Zhao’s recent condition. “I came to the capital to help that child,” Xu Lin said. “Once he’s better, I’ll go back.”

“Why can’t he just leave you alone?” Zong Ningshuang gritted her teeth at the mention of Ji Jinxuan. “Back then, he followed you onto the ship, but he couldn’t catch up. Then his heat hit, and my brother brought him back. I think he was put under confinement for half a year.”

“You have no idea, Ji Jinxuan is insane.” She always had plenty to say when complaining about him. “I tried to sneak up to the mountain to see if I could find something of yours, even just a keepsake. But I found the path to the villa completely blocked off. Ji Jinxuan must have done it! If only he’d put that effort into something else. Oh, but I guess he does put effort into other things. Do you know about his grandfather? Actually, his whole family is messed up. His grandfather was obsessed with research and used Ji Jinxuan for human experiments when he was a child. That must have damaged his brain, or he wouldn’t be like this now.

“To take down his grandfather, he even set up a scheme with that Omega from the Chen family. On the day of the engagement banquet, he used so many resources just to destroy all the reputation and honor his grandfather had built over a lifetime. They’re not family—they’re enemies. But then again, if someone had used me for human experiments, I’d hold a grudge too. Still, none of that has anything to do with you. He lied to you. That was wrong! It was his fault!

“And Ji Jinxuan’s brother. He’s just as crazy.” Zong Ning-shuang huffed. “The Ji family—they’re all masters of mutual destruction. Ugh, forget it. Staying away from them is the right choice.”

Xu Lin’s fingers rested on his glass. Condensation beaded on the outside, the ice inside clinking softly.

“Xu Lin?” She realized he had been silent for a long time and called out softly.

He snapped back, rubbing his stiff, cold fingertips.

“What’s wrong? What are you thinking about?”

He shook his head.

“Nothing…Nothing at all.”