Chapter 29: A beta cannot be marked

Ji Jixuan became exceptionally clingy.

He wouldn’t let Xu Lin out of his sight for even a moment.

The first few days of his rut were the hardest, spent entirely in bed. Xu Lin was tossed around relentlessly.

He was grateful he was a Beta with decent physical condition. If he’d been weaker, Ji Jixuan might have actually killed him.

With Xu Lin’s help, Ji Jixuan’s cravings eased slightly. His mood stabilized enough that he wasn’t constantly demanding Xu Lin’s attention, giving Xu Lin brief moments to breathe.

Though even so, the frequency was still overwhelming for Xu Lin.

Ji Jixuan’s fever never broke. Xu Lin was afraid to give him any medication. The memory of the dense needle marks on Ji Jixuan’s arms made him shudder.

He used cold towels to cool Ji Jixuan’s body, hoping to bring the fever down.

Back in District Thirteen, when they couldn’t afford a doctor, this was how they treated fevers.

Xu Lin didn’t know if this was helpful for an Alpha in rut, but he had to try something—anything was better than nothing.

As he wiped Ji Jixuan down, Ji Jixuan lay still, obeying whatever Xu Lin asked of him. He was surprisingly cooperative. He just lay there, eyes fixed on Xu Lin. Then he’d pull Xu Lin close and flip him onto the bed.

Xu Lin’s nape was bitten countless times.

He hadn’t looked in a mirror, but he knew it must be in terrible shape.

He let Ji Jixuan bite.

He didn’t know if Ji Jixuan had marked him.

Xu Lin wasn’t an Omega. He couldn’t feel it.

If he could smell pheromones, the entire villa would probably be saturated with Ji Jixuan’s scent.

He still didn’t know what Ji Jixuan’s pheromones smelled like.

During this time, Qin Yu came once, as scheduled, to treat Xu Lin’s scars.

But he never entered the villa. He saw Ji Jixuan’s car in the yard, with empty suppressant tubes scattered on the ground. He realized Ji Jixuan was home.

He knocked out of courtesy.

No one answered.

He waited at the door and called, “Mr. Xu Lin?”

Xu Lin desperately wanted to open the door and let Dr. Qin look at Ji Jixuan, but he couldn’t get away.

Ji Jixuan had him pressed against the curtained floor-to-ceiling window, his eyes red, expression displeased. Someone had intruded on his territory, triggering a defensive, aggressive reaction. He held Xu Lin tighter, his grip growing rougher.

Xu Lin wrapped his arms around Ji Jixuan’s neck, buried his face in his shoulder, clenched his teeth, and struggled not to cry out.

Receiving no response, Qin Yu soon left.

He didn’t come back after that.

Xu Lin wasn’t sure if Qin Yu had guessed what was going on. Just taking care of Ji Jixuan was exhausting enough—he had no energy to think about anything else.

When Ji Jixuan wouldn’t let him leave the bed, they survived on nutrient supplements.

During occasional breaks, Xu Lin would struggle to his feet and cook himself something hot. He preferred warm, real food over supplements.

Ji Jixuan followed him everywhere. When Xu Lin ate, Ji Jixuan watched him without blinking.

Xu Lin shared his food with Ji Jixuan. Ji Jixuan would purse his lips and refuse until Xu Lin coaxed him. Then he’d take a few bites, stop again, and Xu Lin would coax him again before he continued.

Xu Lin found his behavior amusing and even endearing as if he’d discovered Ji Jixuan’s alternate personality.

He leaned in and kissed Ji Jixuan’s cheek. “Do you like it? Is it good?”

Ji Jixuan didn’t answer. He leaned in, trying to kiss Xu Lin’s lips. Xu Lin tilted his head back, dodging.

During his rut, Ji Jixuan always wanted to kiss him.

Sometimes Xu Lin would let his guard down, thinking it didn’t matter—just once. But Ji Jixuan’s words—”I don’t like kissing”—would always resurface at the last moment, snapping him to his senses, forcing him to refuse.

It was a pity.

But he didn’t want to do anything Ji Jixuan disliked.

This was the longest Ji Jixuan had ever stayed home.

The calendar on the nightstand hadn’t been marked with an X for many days now.

From the day Ji Jixuan returned, his rut had lasted fifteen days.

Two weeks.

Even Xu Lin knew that wasn’t normal.

He thought that if this continued much longer, he’d have to find a way to bring in a doctor.

On the morning of the sixteenth day, Ji Jixuan opened his eyes.

He didn’t move. He slowly lowered his gaze to the person in his arms.

Xu Lin was sound asleep on his arm, still in the same position they’d fallen asleep in. Ji Jixuan’s arms circled him possessively.

Xu Lin was completely naked. His skin was covered in bruises and marks. His nape was layered with overlapping bite marks.

His own bite marks.

His pheromones all over Xu Lin’s body.

Inside and out.

Ji Jixuan clearly remembered everything that had happened over the past fifteen days.

The rut that had erupted after six months of stability had been fierce. He’d missed his chance to leave, and he’d lost control entirely.

His body wouldn’t obey his mind. Alpha instincts overwhelmed him, making Xu Lin his only lifeline.

Every single thing they’d done in the villa was seared into his memory.

Ji Jixuan gently pulled his arm out from under Xu Lin’s head and sat up.

He opened and closed his hand.

The enormous weight that had been crushing him for so long was gone. The invisible chains on his limbs had vanished. His body felt lighter than it had in years.

He’d completed a full rut.

Not with suppressants, but with Xu Lin’s help.

“Mmm…”

Xu Lin stirred, waking groggily. He blinked his eyes open, saw Ji Jixuan sitting up and staring at his hands, and sat up too, his hair a mess.

Still half-asleep, the first thing he did was feel Ji Jixuan’s forehead.

His eyes flew open.

He was wide awake.

He beamed. “The fever’s gone!”

Ji Jixuan looked at him.

His calm, composed expression made Xu Lin pause. He tried hesitantly, “Xuan-ge? Are you back?”

Ji Jixuan paused, then nodded.

Xu Lin let out a huge sigh of relief and flopped back onto the bed, arms and legs splayed. “Oh, thank goodness. I was so worried. I was thinking if your rut didn’t end, how was I going to get a doctor to see you.”

Then he popped back up, wrapping his arms around Ji Jixuan from behind, resting his cheek on his back.

“I’m glad you’re okay.”

Two weeks had left the villa in disarray. Everywhere bore traces of them. The master bedroom was a disaster.

The sheets had been changed multiple times. The dirty ones lay in a heap on the floor, unwashed. Ji Jixuan stared at the pile of soiled linens.

Xu Lin blushed belatedly.

He remembered how clean Ji Jixuan liked things. During the rut, he’d had no time to clean, nor could he let anyone else in. Naturally, the place was a bit of a mess.

Xu Lin threw on a robe and got up, gathering the dirty sheets to wash. As he bent over, his legs gave way and he collapsed, landing face-first in the pile of linens.

He trembled, trying to get up. The sheets tangled around him. Just as he pulled the sheet off his head, he was caught by the arm and lifted.

Ji Jixuan helped him up.

“I haven’t cleaned up yet. I’ll take care of it—”

Ji Jixuan cut him off. “Go rest.”

“What?”

Xu Lin couldn’t see himself, so he had no idea how terrible he looked. If he were an Omega, he could have filed charges against an Alpha’s violent abuse.

Ji Jixuan picked up the dirty sheets and started cleaning.

“…”

Xu Lin shuffled after Ji Jixuan, watching him patiently load the sheets into the washing machine, then gradually tidy the mess.

“Need any help?” Xu Lin asked, unable to sit still.

Ji Jixuan glanced at him.

“Go lie down,” he said.

“…Oh.”

Ji Jixuan went to the study. The cooler was empty of nutrient supplements, and only a few suppressants remained. He took them out and threw them all in the trash.

They were useless to him now.

He frowned. Had his formula gone wrong? It had worked fine for six months. Why did it suddenly erupt without warning?

And at such an inopportune time.

He’d been so close to settling things with Xu Lin.

Now, everything had gone to waste.

That was why he hated his rut.

Like a mindless beast.

Ugly, drooling, driven by desire.

Caged behind glass walls, observed, recorded—his suffering, his shame. No one cared about his pain. They only extracted his blood and tears, cultivating his misery day after day to pave their own futures.

The sacrifice of a lab mouse had value. But whether it lived or died, whether it suffered—that was just a joke.

If one mouse died, they’d get another.

The one that survived the longest was often the one that suffered the most.

Because it couldn’t die.

Because it was strong.

Because it was Ji Jixuan.

---

Back in the master bedroom, Xu Lin wasn’t in bed.

He was leaning against the balcony railing, a cigarette dangling from his lips, head tilted back, enjoying the morning breeze.

His robe hung open, revealing his collarbones and shoulders covered in marks left by Ji Jixuan.

Ji Jixuan walked over and slid open the glass door. Xu Lin turned.

Ji Jixuan went behind him and lifted the hair at his nape. He had a spray bottle. He shook it and sprayed the bite marks.

Xu Lin obediently lowered his head, cooperating fully.

The cool mist settled on his neck. “It doesn’t hurt anymore. You don’t need to spray it.”

Ji Jixuan said nothing, silently applying the medicine.

Xu Lin held the cigarette between his teeth and asked, “Are you feeling better? Does anything still hurt?”

Ji Jixuan stopped abruptly.

He lowered the bottle. After a long moment, he said, “I’m fine.”

“That’s good.” Xu Lin relaxed completely. He yawned. During Ji Jixuan’s rut, Xu Lin had hardly slept—either from worry over Ji Jixuan’s health, or because Ji Jixuan hadn’t given him time to sleep.

Now that he’d let go, his body went limp.

“Go to sleep,” Ji Jixuan said, taking the cigarette from his lips and nodding toward the room.

“Alright.” As Xu Lin shuffled toward the bed, he paused and turned back. “Don’t you dare leave without telling me while I’m asleep.”

Ji Jixuan nodded.

Only then did Xu Lin hobble into the bedroom, wrap himself in the blankets, and truly fall asleep.

Ji Jixuan held the half-smoked cigarette. Smoke drifted upward and vanished into the air.

The filter was wet, with Xu Lin’s bite marks.

He pressed his thumb to it, feeling the dampness.

Xu Lin, at a time like this, how could you still say such things to me?

I did so many terrible things to you during my rut. I was crude, brutal, like a senseless animal. Shouldn’t you hate me?

The bite marks on your nape are so deep. I was driven by instinct—I tried to mark you.

But a Beta can’t be marked.

Again and again, I tried to make you mine.

But it never worked.

No matter how potent the pheromones, they were useless against a vessel that couldn’t hold them.

I bit your neck until it was a mess. And the first thing you thought of wasn’t yourself—it was to worry about the one who hurt you?

Shouldn’t you have run away?

Why are you still so good to me?

During my rut, I was helpless—completely vulnerable. You could have taken whatever you wanted.

But you didn’t.

You just accepted all of me with care, with tenderness. No one knows what a mindless Alpha might do. You could have been hurt, could have suffered lasting damage.

And still, you stayed by my side. You gave everything you had to help me.

Ji Jixuan was used to countless indifferent eyes watching from behind glass. Used to being strapped to machines, unable to die. Used to enduring everything alone.

But he wasn’t used to being cared for like this.

You put in so much effort. Have you ever thought you might get nothing in return?

Was it worth it?

Why?

Through the balcony door, Ji Jixuan saw their wedding photo on the bedroom wall.

He and Xu Lin, in matching suits, standing before a colorful stained-glass window.

“I’ll hold your hand and walk with you to the very end.

“I’ll become your family.

“We’ll be together forever.”

The image of Xu Lin’s sparkling eyes surfaced in his mind.

The white hospital background. Half of Xu Lin’s face covered in gauze. Sunlight on him, his silhouette glowing—reflected in Ji Jixuan’s still, dead-sea eyes.

What had Xu Lin said then?

He said:

“Because I like you, idiot.”