Chapter 14: Like clutching a lifesaving straw

Translator: Abo Dammen

The two men had come looking for Chi Zhao. It had been half an hour since he went to wash dishes, which was indeed a bit too long, and they ended up overhearing this conversation.

It wasn’t hard to guess why Chi Zhao was saying such things. It was simply that Auntie Zhao didn’t trust Fu Nan’an, and Chi Zhao was explaining on his behalf. Fu Nan’an had seen too many instances of not being trusted. He had sensed Auntie Zhao’s attitude since the morning meal but hadn’t pointed it out.

When you’ve experienced it enough, you stop caring. If he couldn’t even endure this kind of prejudice, he wouldn’t have made it this far. But when it’s something you don’t care about, yet there’s someone who cares for you, who earnestly tells others how excellent you are, unwilling to let others hold the slightest bias against you... this feeling was rather complex.

Chi Zhao was still sparing no effort in explaining to Auntie Zhao, his tone urgent, as if afraid she would misunderstand. The corner of Fu Nan’an’s lips quirked up slightly, and he suddenly remembered a little dog he had once raised at home—a little black Shiba Inu. It was only two or three months old when it first arrived, timid and shy. Fu Nan’an fed it for a few days, and it recognized him as its master.

Fu Nan’an was diagnosed with his eye disease when he was still in university, at an age of soaring ambition and pride. When he first lost his sight, he too had thoughts of giving up on himself and ending it all. He couldn’t accept that the rest of his life would be plunged into darkness, couldn’t accept why it had to be him. Later, a friend gave him that little black Shiba.

A two or three-month-old black Shiba is very small, not much bigger than a palm. Fu Nan’an could pick it up with one hand. Even though it was just a little thing itself, when outsiders came, it would rush in front of Fu Nan’an and bark at them, putting on a fierce front. It wanted to protect him. Fu Nan’an knew this.

Chi Zhao recounted quite a few of Professor Fu’s stories one after another. Some he had heard from Zhong Yangqiu, but more were collected by him through gradual inquiries. Actually, Fu Nan’an didn’t pay much mind to past achievements. The past was the past. It was behind him, and one must look forward.

But right now, Chi Zhao was speaking with exceptional earnestness, so Fu Nan’an also listened attentively. There were some things Fu Nan’an himself didn’t even remember, yet Chi Zhao recounted them one by one as if listing family treasures. Perhaps shocked by his serious tone, or perhaps shocked by Fu Nan’an’s stories, Auntie Zhao’s dishwashing hands remained still for a long, long time. Not until the suds on them were almost dry did she speak, as if sighing in admiration, “This Professor Fu is that remarkable?”

“He absolutely is,” Chi Zhao nodded hurriedly, as if sharing in the honor. “Professor Fu’s office is completely covered with commendatory banners. Many people travel from other places just to get an appointment with him.”

If humans had tails, Chi Zhao’s tail right now would certainly be wagging like a little dog’s, blossoming into a flower. He was overjoyed to have shared Fu Nan’an’s stories with someone else. Turning his head, he suddenly spotted two familiar figures standing behind him.

“Kaiji… P-P-Professor Fu?” The smile from a moment ago was still on Chi Zhao’s face, but his voice caught. “When… When did you get here?”

Auntie Zhao, who had just been criticizing Fu Nan’an, also felt awkward seeing the man himself and laughed awkwardly, chiming in, “Oh my, why have you two doctors come all the way over here? You’re too polite. You should be resting outside!”

“We just came to check,” Chen Kaiji had never been particularly fond of Auntie Zhao, but right now his attention was entirely on Chi Zhao, with no time for her. Usually, Chi Zhao’s personality was quite steady, so this was the first time Chen Kaiji had seen him praise someone so lavishly, praising him to the skies. Chen Kaiji made exaggerated faces at Chi Zhao, saying, “Chi-ge, guess what we just heard?”

Chi Zhao: “……” He didn’t want to guess.

With that reaction, did he even need to guess? They must have heard how he was just praising Fu Nan’an!

Actually, a student praising their teacher is completely normal. But being overheard like this made Chi Zhao feel inexplicably embarrassed. His expression stiffened for a moment, unsure what to say. Fu Nan’an, however, considerately gave him a way out.

“We didn’t hear much,” Fu Nan’an said with a slight smile. “Are you almost finished here? The two of us can come help.”

“No need, no need,” Chi Zhao quickly shook his head, taking the offered escape route. “We’re almost done here. Just one more rinse with clean water.”

The conversation had been overheard, and both Chi Zhao and Auntie Zhao felt somewhat awkward. Not daring to delay, they finished the remaining dishes at top speed. Auntie Zhao hurried away carrying the cleaned bowls and chopsticks, while Chi Zhao followed Fu Nan’an and Chen Kaiji back to the tent area.

“Hey, Chi-ge,” sitting down under the large tent, Chen Kaiji very consciously moved a stool closer to Chi Zhao, his expression nosy. “How do you know so much about Professor Fu’s affairs? Even I, from the Psychology Department, don’t know as much as you.”

“It’s just…” Fu Nan’an was sitting not far away at a table, holding a book. Chi Zhao glanced sideways at him, then hedged evasively, “Just heard from a friend. My friend really admires Professor Fu, so we occasionally chat about his matters.”

“Your friend admires Professor Fu?” Chen Kaiji had seen Chi Zhao’s reaction earlier and didn’t believe his excuse. “Just tell me, is this ‘friend’ actually you?”

“Ahem—”

Chi Zhao broke into a violent cough.

“Don’t get excited, don’t get excited, Chi-ge,” Chen Kaiji quickly patted his back, still grinning. “It’s no big deal. It’s just praising Professor Fu a couple of times. Even if you had a crush on him, it’d be fine! What era is this now!”

Praising someone behind their back really wasn’t a big deal, and a student having admiration for their teacher is completely normal. Chi Zhao wasn’t the prudish type. Normally, he would never think anything of it, but facing Chen Kaiji’s curious gaze now, he instinctively wanted to avoid the question.

At some point, an indescribable emotion had mixed into Chi Zhao’s once open and aboveboard liking for Fu Nan’an, to the extent that even this level of teasing felt unfamiliar and awkward. Especially Chen Kaiji’s mention of “crush” made him feel acutely embarrassed.

“No,” Chi Zhao opened his mouth and replied, “It’s not. I don’t.”

Chen Kaiji, still not entirely convinced, probed a bit more indirectly. Chi Zhao continued to evade, dragging the conversation this way and that, and finally managed to change the subject. A teasing smile still played on Chen Kaiji’s face. During a lull in the laughter and talk, Chi Zhao glanced sideways at Fu Nan’an and saw him still sitting at the table, his fingers on the Braille book, appearing fully engrossed in reading.

Chi Zhao breathed a slight sigh of relief, thinking to himself, ‘Thank goodness he didn’t hear that awkward conversation just now—all that “a friend of mine” and “having a crush” talk.’ It would be too mortifying if the person involved heard it.

The winter afternoon light was soft, covering Fu Nan’an’s body like a faint glow. Chi Zhao gazed at him from the side for a long time before contentedly withdrawing his gaze.

The distance was too far, and the movement of fingers is very subtle. So, he didn’t notice that Fu Nan’an’s finger had actually rested on that one raised Braille dot for a very long time without moving.

He lifted the corner of his lips in a slight smile.

The pleasant lunch break passed quickly, and the afternoon work officially began.

Although it was called work time, it wasn’t much different from the lunch break. Judging by the morning’s situation and the state of education in the village, it was inevitable that not many people would come in the afternoon either.

Chi Zhao flipped through the textbook he had brought to pass the time, and Chen Kaiji fiddled with something unknown beside him. Perhaps it was Fu Nan’an’s influence spreading far and wide, or perhaps heaven simply didn’t want to see them so bored. Although they didn’t get many patients for consultation, just before the end of the workday, a family member of Fu Nan’an’s former patient arrived, bringing a bit of excitement to their rural outreach life. It was a middle-aged man, roughly in his 40s, who rushed straight up to Fu Nan’an as soon as he entered.

“Professor Fu! I’ve finally met you again!” The man carried large and small bags in his hands. Upon seeing Fu Nan’an, he excitedly reached out his hand. “It’s such a surprise to see you here! Do you still remember me? I’m Liu Jingcheng’s father. My son saw you before because of depression.”

Uncle Liu was a native of Dawang Village. A few years ago, after divorcing his wife, he took his son to the provincial capital for work. Usually neglectful of his son’s upbringing, by the time he realized something was wrong, his son was as thin as a rail, his wrists densely covered with knife marks from suicide attempts. He took his son to many hospitals, but the high costs were beyond his means. In his utmost distress, he encountered Fu Nan’an. Professor Fu not only agreed to treat his son but also helped him apply for public welfare. Later, after his son recovered, Uncle Liu still remembered Fu Nan’an’s kindness. Hearing that he had come to his village, he rushed over immediately.

“You are our family’s great benefactor,” Uncle Liu said, tightly gripping Fu Nan’an’s hand without letting go, trying to press the chicken, duck, fish, and meat he held into Fu Nan’an’s hands. “I never expected you to come to our village. As soon as my neighbor mentioned it, I hurried over. Please, you must accept this small token of my gratitude.”

Villagers are simple and sincere. Giving these food items is their highest form of courtesy. Fu Nan’an never accepted gifts from patients or their families. Knowing Liu Jingcheng’s family circumstances were poor, he did not take the items Uncle Liu offered. “You are too kind. This is all part of our job… How is your son doing now?”

“My son is in university now, right in the provincial capital!” Mentioning his son made Uncle Liu even happier. He truly saw his son as his pride. “It’s all thanks to you that he gradually got better. We’ve always remembered you in our hearts. This isn’t anything valuable, please, you must accept it!”

After several rounds of polite refusal, Uncle Liu directly took the chicken, duck, fish, and meat to the kitchen, insisting on cooking for them personally. In the face of such overwhelming hospitality, further refusal would seem cold. Fu Nan’an could only smile helplessly and say, “Then we’ll trouble you.”

Uncle Liu quickly said, “No trouble at all, no trouble at all. You’ve come all this way, so I must cook you a proper meal.”

Uncle Liu worked away from home all year, but he was an excellent cook. He stir-fried small pieces of chicken with chili peppers, braised then deep-fried the duck before sprinkling it with cumin, steamed the fish and topped it with scallions, plus various cold and vegetarian dishes—it could absolutely be called a feast.

After packing up, Auntie Zhao also arrived. Everyone pushed several tables together to form one large table. Dish after dish was served. Although it couldn’t be called precious delicacies, it was absolutely filled with heartfelt sincerity.

“The last soup is here!” Uncle Liu brought the final fish soup to the table. The milky-white, rich broth was dotted with specks of green scallions. Uncle Liu placed the

bowl in the center of the table, with the fish head pointing towards Fu Nan’an. “Professors, please try this. This is my specialty—clear stewed crucian carp soup.”

Uncle Liu had been busy running back and forth many times. Everyone felt sorry seeing him run around, and hurriedly urged him to sit down. An older, senior professor said, “Xiao Liu, stop busying yourself. Come, eat with us.”

Chi Zhao also quickly added, “Yes, Uncle Liu, come and eat. There are already plenty of dishes.”

Uncle Liu had a white towel draped over his shoulder. Hearing this, he took it to wipe his sweat. “Okay, okay, this is the last dish. I’m honored to have a meal with all the professors and teachers.”

Uncle Liu sat down next to Fu Nan’an, and a lively banquet commenced. The rich aroma of food filled the air. As the warm dishes settled in their stomachs, the fatigue from several busy days slowly healed.

Although Uncle Liu’s son was Fu Nan’an’s patient, everyone felt this gratitude and respect from a patient’s family member. This sense of achievement gave them the confidence to continue: You see, although there are still so many unsatisfactory aspects, the Psychology Department is indeed gradually being accepted. They too are white-coated angels healing the sick.

The lively dinner unfolded, with Fu Nan’an being the deserved main character.

Uncle Liu had drunk a little, his face red as he boasted to everyone about where his son was studying now and how brilliantly he was doing, again and again expressing his gratitude for the change Fu Nan’an had brought to his son.

“I didn’t understand anything about psychological illness before. When I saw Xiao Cheng not eating, not drinking, not communicating, I even hit and scolded him, thinking his life was over. Professor Fu counseled Xiao Cheng and also guided me. That’s what made our family whole again,” Uncle Liu was a bit drunk, clutching Fu Nan’an’s hand unwilling to let go. A man in his 40s, his eyes red from crying. “It’s no exaggeration to say Professor Fu is my son’s second parent. You are his great benefactor!”

These were heartfelt words pent up for a long time. Aided by the alcohol, Uncle Liu spoke with exceptional sincerity. Everyone comforted him, saying, “It’s all in the past,” and “The days ahead will get better and better.” Only then did Uncle Liu wipe his tears and thank each doctor one by one.

He bowed deeply to each of them, saying, “Thank you.”

This kind of emotion is very contagious. Chi Zhao also felt a surge of poignant emotion in his heart. Treating illness and saving lives is a doctor’s duty, always holding a gentle heart, whether in Psychology or any other department. Meanwhile, Auntie Zhao, sitting beside him, suddenly patted his shoulder.

“Xiao Chi,” Auntie Zhao’s expression was somewhat troubled, speaking hesitantly, “Auntie has something she wants to ask you…”

It was a bit noisy around them. Chi Zhao lowered his head and leaned closer to her. “Auntie Zhao, please go ahead.”

She asked him, “Is your Professor Fu really that remarkable?”

Chi Zhao nodded, thinking she still didn’t trust him. “Absolutely. Don’t you know Uncle Liu? Isn’t he a living example?”

Auntie Zhao’s mouth opened and closed, as if steeling her resolve. She grabbed Chi Zhao’s hands with both of hers. “Then… could he… could he also take a look at our Yuanliang?”

Her fingers were extremely forceful, their tips trembling slightly, as if clutching a lifesaving straw.