Chapter 4: Your pants don’t fit me

Translator: Abo Dammen

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Case One: The Phantom Sniper

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The elevator ascended, playing soft, soothing music.

The spacious interior was sufficient to prevent awkwardness between two people who weren’t familiar with each other. However, the cabin walls were made of mirrored material. No matter where one looked, it was like looking into a mirror—and sharing that mirror with He Yixun. This was even more disastrous than if the space had been cramped.

It was only at this moment that Xu Pei got a complete look at himself. 

He was covered head to toe in grime, as if he’d just escaped from a refugee camp. Having dozed off in the car, his hair was plastered to the back of his head, with one stubborn tuft sticking out sideways, making it look like he hadn’t washed his hair in ten days.

In contrast, He Yixun only had a slightly wrinkled shirt and hair that was less than perfectly fresh. That was all.

Xu Pei was usually quite meticulous about his appearance, so this contrast was particularly hard for him to accept. He thought about fixing his hair, but in the confined space, any movement felt amplified and would seem deliberate.

Besides, his face was just as dirty, so fixing his hair wouldn’t make much difference anyway. 

Fortunately, the elevator soon reached the floor, sparing him from being forced to share a mirror with He Yixun any longer. Stepping out of the elevator, Xu Pei preemptively declared, “I’m taking a shower first.”

His tone was seventy percent assertive and thirty percent consultative. It wasn’t that he already felt at home here, but rather that he was accustomed to advocating for his own needs.

It wasn’t hard to guess that He Yixun, being single, would only have one bathroom. Considering his fastidiousness, the first thing he would do upon returning home was undoubtedly to shower. That would mean Xu Pei would have to endure his own filth for a while longer.

However, assertiveness didn’t work on He Yixun. He moved his lips and replied without the slightest hesitation, “No.” 

Alright. When under someone else’s roof, one must lower one’s head.

Xu Pei had already resigned himself to showering second, but he wanted to try one more time. “I’m dirtier than you are.”

To his surprise, He Yixun fell silent for two seconds, then suddenly changed his answer, “Fine.”

The unexpected reply made Xu Pei pause mid-step. 

He had always found it strange. Why did He Yixun seem to have accepted his keen sense of smell, yet still found him highly suspicious?

Now, however, it made perfect sense.

In fact, He Yixun’s thought process was quite easy to understand. He wasn’t an unreasonable person; on the contrary, he was excessively logical. So much so that unless he witnessed something with his own eyes, like Xu Pei’s “talent show”, he wouldn’t believe anything that couldn’t be explained by conventional reasoning.

Entering the foyer, Xu Pei glanced around and discovered that the spacious open-plan apartment had all its interior walls removed except for the bathroom, leaving only a few load-bearing pillars. The entire layout of the room was visible at a glance. 

Floor-to-ceiling windows on three sides offered unobstructed views, looking out onto the faintly whitening sky and the beautiful city skyline.

Taking off his shoes and stepping onto the floor, Xu Pei walked straight inward. “I need to borrow some clothes to wear.”

He Yixun, behind him, called out, “Come back here.”

Xu Pei turned back, puzzled. 

“Arrange your shoes properly, with the toes pointing outward.”

He Yixun’s own pair of lace-up oxfords served as the perfect example. They were neatly placed on the floor mat, like soldiers standing at attention for inspection.

Beside them lay the two round-toe leather shoes Xu Pei had casually kicked off, resembling ordinary civilians who had stumbled disruptively into a military parade.

It had been a long time since Xu Pei had been “corrected” like this. For a moment, he had a flashback to the orphanage teacher who made him fold his blankets. 

He returned to the foyer, properly arranged his shoes, and asked, “Is this acceptable?”

The senior officer inspected the two new recruits, seemingly quite satisfied. “I’ll go get you some clothes.”

Having experienced the most peculiar night of his life, Xu Pei was finally able to hit pause, properly rest, and relax.

When he was alone and quiet, the surreal feeling of having crossed worlds amplified once again. Xu Pei wiped the steam off the mirror with his hand and looked at his reflection in this unfamiliar space, as if trapped in a dream from which he couldn’t wake up. 

He raised his hand, extended his index finger, and poked it towards the mirror, inexplicably feeling that the surface might be like a swamp, swallowing his finger whole.

His fingertip touched the mirror, and the ridiculous thought came to an abrupt halt. Xu Pei sighed, finally accepting the fact that he couldn’t return for the time being.

Using a bath towel to dry the water droplets from his body, Xu Pei picked up the clothes He Yixun had found for him, which was a white short-sleeved shirt and a pair of sweatpants.

Xu Pei was 1.78 meters tall, which wasn’t considered short for an omega, but compared to the long-limbed He Yixun, he could only be described as slender and small. 

The shoulder seams of the white shirt slid down to his arms, and the hem almost covered his thighs. It would be fine to sleep in, but—

He couldn’t keep the pants on.

Even after tightening the drawstring waist to its limit, the pants could only barely hang onto his hip bones.

It didn’t really matter, Xu Pei thought. He would just go sleep on the sofa and put on his dried clothes in the morning. 

So, holding up the pants, Xu Pei walked out of the bathroom.

On the other side, hearing the noise, He Yixun picked up his change of clothes and walked over. “You’ll sleep on the sofa.”

There was only one large bed in the apartment. Xu Pei had already anticipated his fate and had no objections. “Fine,” he said.

But just as he was about to brush past He Yixun, he suddenly stepped on the overly long pant leg, stumbled, and the waistband slipped from his hand down to his ankles. 

Xu Pei: “…..”

His underwear was already washed. His butt felt cool and exposed.

Professor Xu coughed awkwardly, squatted down with a completely normal expression to pull up his pants, and said to He Yixun, “Your pants don’t fit me.”

“You don’t have to wear them,” He Yixun said indifferently, withdrawing his gaze. “I have no interest in you.” 

The bathroom door closed again. Through the frosted glass, the silhouette showed He Yixun taking off his top shirt, his well-built physique from long-term exercise fully on display.

Xu Pei felt a faint sense of insult.

After all, in his world, the alphas who vied for his favor could form a line stretching from the National Research Institute all the way to the Parliament building.

However, the moment he realized he was judging his own worth based on the attention of alphas, he immediately quashed that displeasure. 

It was normal for He Yixun to have no interest in him. Why was he getting competitive over such a trivial matter?

A fleece blanket was spread on the sofa, sufficient to serve as a quilt in the heated room.

The sound of water from the shower acted like white noise. Xu Pei pulled the blanket over himself, and as soon as his head touched the throw pillow—yes, He Yixun’s home didn’t even have an extra proper pillow—he fell into a deep sleep. He closed his eyes and opened them again to find the sun already high in the sky outside the window.

It had been a long time since he’d experienced such high-quality sleep. Even the usually self-disciplined Professor Xu felt the urge to laze in bed, nestling on the sofa and not wanting to get up. 

His well-rested brain began to resume its usual operational efficiency, and the issue he’d hastily glossed over before sleep resurfaced in his mind.

——He should have felt insulted.

The offense didn’t come from He Yixun’s lack of interest in him, but from He Yixun’s presumption of a premise: namely, that Xu Pei was worried He Yixun might develop inappropriate thoughts upon seeing his legs. He Yixun’s statement was a response to that presumed worry.

The key was, Xu Pei had no such worry! 

In his eyes, He Yixun was just an impotent alpha. What did he have to worry about?

If he had any real concerns, he wouldn’t have followed He Yixun home in the first place.

Therefore, He Yixun’s presumption that Xu Pei harbored such thoughts was itself a malicious assumption.

No, this matter had to be clarified. 

Even though He Yixun had only uttered one sentence in the entire incident, Xu Pei inexplicably felt like he hadn’t argued his point effectively.

Just then, sounds of the duvet being thrown back and slippers scuffing against the floor came from the other side. Xu Pei knew He Yixun was getting up. He scrambled up from the sofa, and then immediately saw a scene that utterly shocked him.

He Yixun wasn’t wearing a shirt. The clear lines of his muscles were far more visible than the blurred silhouette on the frosted glass, causing Xu Pei’s pheromones to fluctuate uncontrollably.

However, that wasn’t the main point. 

He was wearing a pair of loose lounge pants. The fabric, which should have hung down, was tented by a substantial bulge. With every step he took, it swayed accordingly.

Xu Pei was simply unable to believe it. What on earth was this man doing?

He frowned and said with a serious expression, “Officer He, could you please be more mindful of propriety?”

He Yixun walked to the kitchen, poured a glass of water, and upon hearing the accusation, merely glanced at Xu Pei. He slowly drank half the glass before asking, “What propriety?” 

His voice, moistened by the water, was still slightly hoarse. His look towards Xu Pei was one of bewilderment; he clearly didn’t understand what Xu Pei was talking about.

“In my world, we are of different genders. Please put your clothes on,” said Xu Pei, unable to conceal his anger. He swept a glance at the thing in He Yixun’s pants pointing eighty degrees perpendicular to the ground and quickly averted his eyes. “And cover up that… indecent part of yourself as well.”

He Yixun set his water glass down on the kitchen island, looked down at himself, and asked, “What do you mean, ‘different genders’?”

He didn’t see why, since they were both men, a normal morning erection needed to be hidden away. 

Xu Pei found it difficult to explain that in his world, gender was divided by ABO. Based on his shallow understanding of He Yixun, this man would only believe him if he saw his gland, and Xu Pei would absolutely never expose his gland to anyone.

“In short, I am different from you,” Xu Pei said. “You experience morning wood, and I do not. That is the difference between us.”

He Yixun fell silent for a full minute.

It wasn’t that he was unaware some people don’t get morning erections, but he was stunned that someone would announce this fact so seriously. 

He was 1% convinced that Xu Pei might indeed be from another world.

“Because you don’t, and I do, that makes us different genders.” This logic was truly beyond He Yixun’s comprehension. “What exactly do I need to be mindful of? Not making you jealous?”

Ha?

This truly hit Xu Pei’s biggest sore point. 

He deeply despised the sense of superiority that alphas often unconsciously exuded. Although He Yixun wasn’t a genuine alpha, that air of superiority was exactly the same.

Considering he was living under someone else’s roof, Xu Pei suppressed the irritation in his heart and said, “What I mean is, don’t give me sexual hints. I’m not interested in you. You can monitor me all you want, but don’t disrespect me.”

He Yixun picked up the half-glass of water from the island, didn’t drink it, but just held it to his lips, sipping lightly as he looked at Xu Pei with meaningful scrutiny.

So, Xu Pei knew he was being monitored. 

Bringing Xu Pei home was certainly not an act of kindness from He Yixun. It was merely to wait for Xu Pei to slip up.

In He Yixun’s view, the absence of Xu Pei’s information in the system could be explained in multiple ways.

The simplest was he was using a fake name and had undergone plastic surgery. Or, he had been isolated from the world since birth and had never had any records created.

Expanding that train of thought, he could also be a skilled hacker who had deleted his own information from the system. Or perhaps he was a person with special abilities trained by some unknown criminal organization. 

All the above hypotheses were less far-fetched than dimensional travel.

Regardless of what Xu Pei was trying to hide, He Yixun’s approach was simple.

Since Xu Pei claimed to have crossed worlds, he must have nowhere to go.

Having no identity also meant he couldn’t get a job, which meant he couldn’t support himself. 

Under these circumstances, by offering food and shelter, He Yixun made an offer Xu Pei couldn’t possibly refuse. Because once he refused, his words and actions would become contradictory.

This way, He Yixun could monitor Xu Pei 24/7. Whatever Xu Pei wanted to go out and do, he would need a reasonable excuse.

And as a person of unknown identity who falsely claimed to have crossed worlds, Xu Pei should have his original residence and even social connections. He couldn’t possibly spend all his time at He Yixun’s place; eventually, he would reveal a flaw.

So, what He Yixun needed to do was quietly watch Xu Pei act, to see how long he could keep up the performance. 

However, it seemed now that Xu Pei was more difficult to handle than He Yixun had imagined.

He intentionally said baffling things to corroborate his identity as a dimensional traveler, indicating he had extreme confidence in controlling the direction of his script.

If such a person were truly a criminal, he would definitely be the most dangerous type: the highly intelligent kind.

He Yixun suddenly felt that being soft-suspended might not be such a bad thing after all. 

Because compared to the shooting case, he was more interested in figuring out where this extra puzzle piece, Xu Pei, came from.

Rinsing the water glass and placing it back on the rack, He Yixun walked out from behind the kitchen island, unsurprised to see Xu Pei avert his gaze as if facing a formidable enemy.

He was acting quite convincingly.

“It’s gone down already,” He Yixun said. 

Xu Pei breathed a sigh of relief and said earnestly, “Did you hear what I said? This is very important to me.”

Originally, He Yixun had intended to go back to the bedroom to put on a shirt, but as he passed the sofa, he stopped.

Who knew how much Professor Xu tossed and turned in his sleep? The ill-fitting pants had been kicked to the other end of the sofa, crumpled into a ball. The T-shirt was still too big for him; the collar was askew, revealing half of his collarbone and a small part of his shoulder.

He probably liked to sleep clutching the blanket between his legs, but because the blanket was narrow, in order to get more of it between his legs, he had placed one leg outside, fully exposed to He Yixun’s view. 

He Yixun knew Professor Xu wasn’t wearing underwear because his underwear was currently hanging on the heated towel rack in the bathroom.

Following the smooth line of the thigh upward, he unsurprisingly caught a glimpse of a buttock.

Talk about a double standard.

“You’re the same, Professor Xu,” He Yixun said, striding past towards the bedroom. “Don’t give me any hints either.” 

What hint had he given?!

Xu Pei jolted awake to the implication, looked down at his own leg, and was instantly filled with immense annoyance.

Damn it. If he had known, he would have checked his appearance first. Once again, he felt like he hadn’t argued his point effectively.