Chapter 29: I am just a pervert

Translator: Abo Dammen

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Case Two: Dance of the Night Charm

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He was dead.

He died on an utterly ordinary night.

He no longer existed in that world over there. 

He should be utterly obliterated in this world here.

He closed his eyes, telling himself it was all a dream, then opened them again—

Thankfully, He Yixun had averted his gaze.

He was looking at his own police uniform, at the stain left by Xu Pei. His expression shifted from initial shock to being lost in thought. 

It was as if he was analyzing Xu Pei’s mental process.

…….

Maybe it really would be better to just die.

The key problem was that he couldn’t die! 

Human beings can unleash powerful potential in extreme situations. Xu Pei’s ability to psychologically brace himself had reached a new level.

Embarrassment? Shame?

Nonexistent.

Anyway, he was just passing through this world briefly. Eventually, he would return to his own world. 

It was like traveling to the other side of the Earth. So what if he streaked naked down the street? The ones getting hurt would be the passersby. He could just wave his sleeves, not taking away a single cloud.

Besides, Dr. Zhen was already analyzing the meteorite data. He believed that in the near future, he would be able to leave this land of social death.

From stunned to panicked, from helpless to resigned, Xu Pei felt like a century had passed.

In reality, it was less than a minute. 

With a perfectly calm face, he sat up and asked He Yixun quite politely, “Could you pass me the tissues?”

People who don’t masturbate frequently lack the experience and don’t know to keep tissues handy.

He Yixun turned and went to the living room to get the tissue box.

Thank goodness. He didn’t comment on Xu Pei’s actions at all. 

Xu Pei seemed tough and unbreakable on the outside, but inside he was as fragile as cracked glass, shattering at a touch.

He pulled out two tissues, first wiping his hand and the feeble “willpower.” Only after cleaning himself up did he dare touch the police uniform. otherwise, he felt it would be defiling it.

Even though he already had.

Before Xu Pei could finish cleaning up, He Yixun took the uniform and examined the white “pattern” on it without much expression. 

Help.

Streaking really isn’t something ordinary people can do.

Even on the other side of the Earth, shame was about to drown Xu Pei.

The awkwardness was unbearable. He had no choice but to steel himself and speak, “This will be hard to wash, right?” 

As long as he could keep the conversation going, the suffocating atmosphere would soon disappear.

Based on Xu Pei’s understanding of He Yixun, if it were ordinary clothes, he’d probably just throw them away. But you can’t just get a new police uniform, right?

So, he’d most likely order Xu Pei with a dark face to wash it clean, just like washing the cup. Then Xu Pei would apologize, obediently take the clothes to the bathroom to deal with them, and this darkest moment of his life would pass.

At least, Xu Pei thought this was a predictable outcome. 

Who knew, when He Yixun looked at the white stain, he didn’t scowl. He just glanced faintly at Xu Pei and said, “You knew that, yet you still came on it.”

He wasn’t angry at all, only possessing the calm understanding of someone who “knew you were up to no good at home all along.”

The cracked glass suffered a heavy blow. The mentally strong Professor Xu was on the verge of breaking.

He took a deep breath and adopted a stuffy, old-fashioned tone, “That was an accident.” 

Like a professor caught making a mistake in front of his student, still clinging to the last shred of stubbornness.

“So, where were you originally planning to shoot?” Officer He interrogated Suspect Xu with pinpoint accuracy. “You didn’t even get tissues ready.”

Xu Pei: “…..”

Crack, crack. A glass heart was quietly shattering. 

How could someone blame another person for not getting tissues ready before masturbating?!

Is that the point?!

He Yixun glanced at the sheets beneath Xu Pei. Ignoring his chilly backside, he lifted all the blankets to check. He found the bed wasn’t the disaster zone of a “flood” he had anticipated.

“You didn’t produce fluid this time?” he asked. 

“Was it like the first time, with no lubricating secretion?

“But you didn’t ejaculate the first time, and you did this time. Why is that?

“How many types of heat do you have?

The curious child was back online. 

All the effort made to maintain appearances went down the drain. Xu Pei finally couldn’t hold back his outburst. “That’s enough, He Yixun!

“I’m begging you, act like a decent human being, will you? Any decent person knows you should tactfully avoid someone’s private moments. Who stares and asks follow-up questions like you do?”

“You’re making this incredibly awkward for me, you know?!

Might as well lay it all out and shift the blame. 

He Yixun was silent for a moment, then said quite reasonably, “But you were on my bed, using my police uniform. I think I have the right to…”

“Enough!” Xu Pei raised a hand, stopping He Yixun from continuing. With a ‘nothing left to lose‘ mentality of someone who has given up, he preemptively retorted, “Aren’t you just bothered that I used your police uniform? It’s because you weren’t here! I need to smell your scent to be able to… finish! It’s determined by my body, it’s not something I can control with my will!”

“But I rarely wear my police uniform,” He Yixun disputed. “My scent is stronger on my loungewear.”

Xu Pei: “……” 

Professor Xu took a deep breath and said through gritted teeth, “I’m just a pervert, so what are you going to do about it?”

Indeed, ‘shameless is invincible’. Xu Pei’s self-abandonment finally managed to shut He Yixun up.

But only for three seconds.

“I understand,” He Yixun suddenly said. 

What the hell do you understand now?

“You told Zhen Li that in your world, alphas can mark omegas, making the omegas dependent on them,” He Yixun said thoughtfully. “Have you been marked by me?”

…This impotent comrade really dared to imagine things.

But it had to be admitted, his logic was very sound. 

Couldn’t this explanation perfectly account for Xu Pei’s behavior?

Moreover, Xu Pei had long since discovered that the best way to deal with this curious student was to talk nonsense.

“So that’s it,” Professor Xu brought out his best acting skills, slightly furrowing his brow and ‘started talking nonsense’. “We’ve exchanged bodily fluids. I might really have been marked by you.”

He Yixun nodded. “Then your behavior is understandable.” 

Xu Pei didn’t even need to find a way out for himself; the steps appeared right under his feet.

Originally, he had been exposing his ‘bird’ and felt somewhat awkward. Though, compared to the other issues, the exposure wasn’t the main concern anymore. Now, he wasn’t even embarrassed about that anymore. Leaning back on his hands, he looked at the police uniform in He Yixun’s hand and asked, “Then, about this uniform…”

“I’ll wash it,” He Yixun said.

Huh? 

Did Officer He already have the awareness of a married alpha?

“I’m afraid you’ll just make it dirtier.”

Xu Pei: “……”

What, did he need to go for another round? 

Taking the police uniform to the bathroom, He Yixun unbuttoned the cuffs, rolled his shirt sleeves up to his elbows, turned on the faucet, and began rinsing the white stain on the hem.

Luckily, there wasn’t much. And it wasn’t very thick.

Not like last time in the bathtub.

…Wait. 

Why was he thinking about how easy it was to clean, rather than finding some reason to order a new uniform?

Why not just throw it away?

Right, because finding a reason would be troublesome.

Police uniforms are custom-ordered in batches. Ordering a single piece specially is a hassle. 

But if someone else had soiled his uniform like this…

No, impossible.

Just the thought was enough to make him nauseous.

Perhaps humans are naturally more tolerant towards puppies. 

Especially a Beagle Great Demon King.

Since meeting Xu Pei, He Yixun had constantly had his perceptions challenged. So it seemed no matter what Xu Pei did, he wouldn’t be surprised.

And, taking a step back, this was also something Xu Pei couldn’t control. He could only blame it on him being born in a barbaric society.

The stain was no longer visible. He Yixun wrung out the excess water and placed the uniform in the washing machine. 

Returning to the living room, a certain someone had long since put his pants back on and was lying on his side on the sofa watching TV, looking as comfortable as if the “very awkward” situation he mentioned had never happened.

Hearing He Yixun come out of the bathroom, he scooted up and peeked his head over the back of the sofa. “Finished washing?”

He Yixun walked straight into the bedroom and took off the shirt with the very wrinkled sleeves. “Reminding you again, next time I’m not here, remember to use tissues.”

Xu Pei pursed his lips and muttered, “I know.” 

Noticing the head peeking over the back of the sofa hadn’t retracted, He Yixun stopped unbuckling his belt. “Why are you looking at me?”

“Because I’m a pervert,” Xu Pei declared boldly. “I just enjoy peeking at you changing clothes.”

Whether it was He Yixun’s misconception or not, sometimes Xu Beagle seemed to deliberately oppose him. Perhaps it was because he reminded Xu Pei to use a tissue, and Xu Pei disliked being lectured.

So easy to read. 

He Yixun didn’t say anything more. He pulled out his belt, took off his suit pants, picked up his change of clothes, and headed towards the bathroom. However, halfway there, his phone on the nightstand suddenly rang. He had to turn back and was somewhat surprised to see it was Lin Mei calling.

“Remember to attend the Chief Justice’s funeral on time tomorrow. Don’t forget how well he took care of you when you were young,” Lin Mei on the other end of the line was as domineering as ever, despite her impending departure from the mayor’s office. “Also, Luo You is back from abroad. He says you’re ignoring him. What’s going on? Don’t take your issues with the older generation out on the younger one.”

Luo You was Luo En’s grandson, and his only direct lineal descendant.

Luo En’s relationship with his daughter had always been poor because she didn’t go into politics as he wished and married a rural teacher he looked down on. Later, the daughter’s family moved abroad. In a fit of anger, Luo En cut ties with his daughter and began focusing on cultivating Lin Mei instead. He didn’t even attend his daughter’s funeral abroad when she passed away from illness. 

Naturally, Luo You had no affection for Luo En, but Lin Mei treated him quite well. So before going abroad, he would always seize any opportunity to visit He Yixun’s home.

A couple of days ago, he had messaged He Yixun, stating his flight number and arrival time, asking He Yixun to pick him up from the airport. He Yixun had said he didn’t have time and told him to take a taxi back himself.

He Yixun didn’t recall ignoring him.

“I’m not that childish.” 

“Be there on time,” Lin Mei reiterated before hanging up.

Placing the phone back on the nightstand, He Yixun turned his head and found Xu Pei behind the sofa was still watching him. Only the moment he turned, the gaze quickly shifted upwards from lower down.

“Lin Mei?” Xu Pei asked.

This was actually easy to guess. 

Because He Yixun wasn’t the type to say something like “I’m not that childish” to just anyone.

“Tomorrow we’re going to the Progressive Society’s den,” He Yixun responded. “Go to sleep early.”